Hero Inc.

The other day at work, I received a random message over IM from a user I did not know. The user in question was someone I had met in a previous life on the internet when I was part of the e-fedding world. I know I’m going to regret this post later but oh well.

What is an e-fed?
Well, before there was fantasy football, fantasy baseball, or fantasy anything, there was fantasy wrestling. That’s right. Wreslting. I’m talking about Ric Flair, Hulk Hogan, and Sting. That kind of wrestling. According to wiki, an e-fed is a fictional wrestling promotion where the basic premise is that a player creates a character and manages his or her career.

Over my e-fedding career, there were two different ways to play but both shared a common aspect. The first e-fed I joined utilized a piece of software that would simulate wrestling matches. That’s right people. There is software out there that would simulate a wrestling match based on the type of match and the wrestlers that were placed into that match. You could setup all different types of matches (ladder, four way, Last Man Standing, etc.) as well as wrestler types (grappler, high flyer, technician, etc.). Most of the matches were very redundant due to the limits of the software. It was still cool at the time. The second type of e-fed I joined did not use the software. For each weekly event and monthly “PPV” writers would scribe the entire match and any other aspect of the show. This could be attacks in the backstage area, interviews, or vinettes. As you can imagine (if you are even trying), shows were constantly postponed due to the amount of time it would take to write these events. I tried to write a few here and there but I wasn’t any good.

The overall common component of both types was the aspect of role playing. Once you created your wrestler, you had to bring the wrestler to life through promos or interviews. These are just online postings where you build up your fight for the week or whatever feud you are currently involved in. There were limitations on what you could say or do in an interview to keep the fantasy as “real” as possible (i.e. no using wrestlers that were not your own). There was a point in time where I was having to write a promo a day for 4 days a week to prepare for my weekly match. Each promo could have taken me about 2 hours to write, which isn’t fun when Word suddenly crashes on you and you have to type it up again from scratch.

Who were my characters?
When I first started out, I created a tag team known as Snakebite (Viper and Venom). They basically had no personality and died rather quickly in my eyes but thanks to the software of the e-fed they were slightly above a jobber. Soon I began a feud with the resident outsiders of the federation and I needed a new “big guy” to combat the size of this wrestler known as Oz. I, therefore, created X who was almost 8 feet tall. I wasn’t very creative in the beginning. There was also Mondo for a short period of time but I actually ended up killing him off to make way for another character.

By killing off Mondo, I was able to create a storyline where Mondo’s brother would enter the federation in order to enact revenge on those responsible for Mondo’s overdose. Mondo’s brother was originally known as Cryus “The Virus” Fury. For those movie buffs out there, yes I did steal the name from Con Air. Cyrus was a loner who was more of a homeless bum. I modeled him after another real wrestler, Saturn. His style was hardcore and it allowed me to write for a darker style character.

Around the same time as Cryus, Buddy “Man of Action” Lee was born. This single moment is probably the start of the hero complex, but that’s an argument for another day. Buddy Lee was the hero everyone wanted and needed. He was the ultimate face that the crowd would love. With entrance music by Foo Fighters “My Hero,” I had finally found a character that I could really get into. After a few months, I was tired of writing for a face because of the limitations. When Buddy Lee moved to a heel status, he took on an arrogant, “I’m better than the entire world” attitude as well as the moniker “Mr. Hero.” On occasion Buddy Lee would use Cryus as a lackey and a tag team was formed, The Hero Selective. Both Buddy Lee and Cyrus held multiple tiles with Buddy Lee coming out ahead in the singles category with World titles in more than one federation.

	Name	Buddy Lee
	Hometown	Calgary, Alberta, Canada
	Wrestler Type	All Rounder
	Entrance Music	Foo Fighters “My Hero”
	Catchphrase	I am the Hero of All Heroes, your Paragon of Virtue, and the TRUE Man of Action.
	Finisher(s)	Buddy Lee Bomb, (Gut-Wrench Powerbomb), Herosault (Moonsault), Herovation (2 Powerbombs and a DVD)

	Name	Cyrus Fury
	Hometown	Chicago, Illinois
	Wrestler Type	Hardcore
	Entrance Music	Chevelle “Family System”
	Catchphrase	Feel my FURY!
	Finisher(s)	The Fatality (Reverse Inverted DDT that drops the opponent’s back onto a knee)

Now to make sure those videos from the TWF never show up. Man, how old was I?